2012 IN POP MUSIC: A RETROSPECTIVE

So, the Grammys are tonight. I’m probably not going to watch them. That’s not because I have no interest; on the contrary, I’d love to see Justin Timberlake, Taylor Swift, and Adele perform, and the performances by Chuck D and Sting/Bruno Mars sound magnificently weird. But I’d be watching them alone online (if I can watch them at all) as I don’t have a TV in my room right now. I’m not clear on whether or not they’re actually going to stream the broadcast; they are, however, streaming the Red Carpet and the pre-telecast awards. If I can watch, I might, but the energy will largely be gone from watching with a room full of people who feel like yelling at the screen when Kelly Clarkson inevitably wins Song of the Year.

But the Grammys convinced me that it was worth releasing my (extremely late) 2012 pop music write-up. In case you didn’t already know, I really do like pop music. Quite a bit, it turns out. While I’ve been working on listening to albums for review, I’ve been going back to the pop music of 2012 to pick me up when I’m driving or walking from class to class.

2012 has been a pretty strange year for pop music. Two of the top three Billboard hits of the year were not even definitively “pop songs,” with the indie rock of Gotye and fun. reshaping the way we think about pop music. Their efforts would have been ineffective without the work Adele performed last year, but their style has supplanted Adele’s somewhat, with groups like Imagine Dragons, Neon Trees, and The Lumineers all netting Top 100 hits. To be clear, this is a year where Rick Ross has officially been chased off the charts, while Lil Wayne doesn’t have a single song to call his own. This is kind of crazy.

But let’s hit it. I’m gonna write about my favorite and least favorite songs and trends of 2012 in regards to pop music. I’m going to mostly be focusing on songs that released as singles in 2012 that achieved year-end Hot 100 status. Why “released as singles in 2012?” Well, so I don’t use this as an opportunity to tell you how glad I am that Rolling in the Deep is still playing, or that I’m glad songs from Watch The Throne made the year-end charts. And why “year-end charters?” Also so that I make it clear that I’m covering “hit” songs, which is more relevant in terms of worst songs than best. Obviously, there will be more incompetent music released in 2012 than some of my listed “worsties.” But I can easily cover 100 songs, and so I’m going to do so.

But, first, a quick look back at 2011.

MY 2011 LIST, AND REFLECTIONS

I…well, I goofed in my treatment of Adele. Sorry, guys. I’ve come to recognize that “Someone Like You” is a pretty brilliant piece, even if Adele’s voice on the chorus has issues. Dropped an octave or two, it’s drop-dead gorgeous from the first note. And Rolling in the Deep should probably sneak up the list at a pretty rapid rate.

The rest of those best songs? I still like them, but they haven’t stayed powerful throughout the year. Blow and All of the Lights are still great songs, but my top two picks have fallen in esteem for me. We Found Love simply doesn’t have the staying power of “Rude Boy,” and I haven’t had an itch to listen to “You & I” in almost a year. “Party Rock Anthem” is a song I’ve grown numb to as well.

I’m glad “The One That Got Away,” and Watch The Throne eventually saw hit status. That’s already happened for some of the songs that didn’t make the year-end charts for me, and that’s exciting too. 

Ultimately, most of the trends I posted saw major responses in 2012, too. Let’s get into it for real.

THE FIVE BEST HIT SONGS OF 2012

5. “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” by Taylor Swift

There was a time where this spot was held by Philip Phillips’ “Home,” which is a pretty song. But something about the catchy and goofy “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” is an absolutely fun party song. It’s also Taylor Swift’s best song construction on a single yet, perhaps only surpassed by “I Knew You Were Trouble.” She’s getting better as she gets older, and while her singles reflect a pop focus, she’s doing some interesting things on her albums, too. There’ll probably be a review at some point.

4. “Die Young” by Ke$ha

I maintain that Ke$ha is the standard bearer for pop music. “Tik Tok” became a pop-defining smash, creating a song format used in Katy Perry’s “California Gurls,” Taio Cruz’s “Dynamite,” and P!nk’s “Raise Your Glass” before also setting a tone for the sing-talk revolution. “Blow” served as a refreshing blast of synthpop during a period dominated by “Rolling in the Deep” and “The Lazy Song,” while also laying down the volume required for “Party Rock Anthem.” It helps that it also carries the first half of the beat for PSY’s dominant “Gangnam Style” throughout its runtime. Now, with “Die Young,” Ke$ha’s abandoned the auto-tune, added the kind of drums fun. and Imagine Dragons banged so hard upon throughout the year, and combined those things with the basic chord structure of “Levels”/”Good Feeling” while still crafting one of the best hooks of the year. This is a song that has led to me hearing a different person declare Ke$ha “a guilty pleasure” once per day for almost a week straight, and for plenty of the time since its release. But, if we’re being honest, there’s nothing to be guilty about.

3. “Some Nights” by fun.

Pop music critic Todd in the Shadows probably already put it best, but I’ll paraphrase; if fun. desperately wants to be Queen, then “Some Nights” is probably their “Bohemian Rhapsody.” And, if I’m being completely honest with myself, it actually holds up against some of Queen’s better songs. Sure, it’s not quite “Somebody to Love,” but it’s a gorgeous and brilliant piece of pop experimentation. The elements I adore from Kanye’s “Lost in the World” recur here thanks to the shared DNA of producer Jeff Bhasker.

Anyways, this song is a spot lower than it probably could be because I really dislike the campy spoken monologue in the song’s center.

2. “Climax” by Usher

This one’s probably 90% Usher’s gorgeous voice, and I have no issue with that. While there’s lots of smart songwriting (creating a song about a drawn-out declining relationship named “Climax” that fails to ever really climax while still containing plenty of sexual moaning is pretty much the best use of Usher I can imagine) Usher’s voice simply floats throughout. Diplo’s beat is a great backdrop, too, but I didn’t hear a vocal that came even close.

1. “Take Care” by Drake & Rihanna

I could probably write on this one for days, and at some point probably will. Rihanna sounds absolutely smoldering here, and Drake swings between joyful, loving, melancholy, apologetic, and tortured with absolute alacrity. His voice, while not a gorgeous voice, is emotional throughout, and the delivery is pitch-perfect. Jamie xx’s beat sets a great, energetic backdrop for the performances, and the breakdown after the second verse is absolutely the best moment for pop music this year. I would go so far as to say I’m already confident that “Take Care” is one of the best songs ever to show up on the charts.

THE FIVE WORST HIT SONGS OF 2012

5. “Fifty Ways To Say Goodbye” by Train

Can we let Train go? Please? This song has little redeeming musical value (some goofy mariachi horns are its buoy,) and its lyrics are absolutely beyond absurd. It’s nonsense. It doesn’t help that it’s a song about how, after a non-mutual break-up, the narrator tells all his friends that his ex-girlfriend is dead because he can’t admit she dumped him. It’s supposed to be funny, but the jokes don’t play, and Pat Monahan is too old to sell the comedy anyways. You’re forty three, Pat, and you’re no Jeff Foxworthy, let alone a Jim Gaffigan or Louis C.K. Try something else.

4. “Drunk On You” by Luke Bryan

Luke Bryan seeks to write a love song, but its lyrics are just too hammy to sell his superficial lusting. I don’t like coming after country; it’s full of easy jokes and traps tied to ignorance of the genre. But I like some country, and this falls well below the standards. The music is very mediocre, but the lyrics are absolutely crazy bad. Non-rhymes, mhmms, the absurd “We’ll take it off on out in the water,” it’s just poorly constructed. Smart songwriting could pull it from the brink, but it’s nowhere to be found.

3. “Work Hard Play Hard” by Wiz Khalifa

This is mostly here as punishment for the second-worst hook of the year. I have no problem with luxury rap, though nothing here is especially good. I just never want to hear the “WORK HARD PLAY HARD” part of it ever again.

2. “Want U Back” by Cher Lloyd

Okay, now, here’s the first song I have trouble actually sitting through top-to-bottom. Yes, Cher Lloyd is attractive. No, she’s definitely not cute. She’s obnoxious and immediately reminds me of everything men think about the women that want to continue a relationship after a break-up. She can’t sing well enough to carry the song, and the beat is a muddled rehash of the significantly better “Party in the USA.”

Urgh.

1. “Birthday Cake (Remix)” by Rihanna & Chris Brown

It really speaks for itself. When I reviewed Rihanna’s “Talk That Talk,” I said I’d be okay with almost any song from the album becoming a hit single. This was the exception, a lame fragment of a joke track that, it turns out, would set up for the full single featuring Chris Brown. The Rihanna/Chris Brown collaboration would be questionable all the same, but Turn Up The Music is, at least, a semi-decent song. This is not close. It’s truly, truly awful. Please, please, please take it away.

WISH YOU WERE HERE: Seven songs that might have made my list, were they hits. Obviously, “Thrift Shop” and “I Knew You Were Trouble” have decent shots at being 2013 hits, but they absolutely belong. Videos linked by song title.

-“Skyfall” Easily would have snuck up the list.

-“Bom Bom” Not a popular song in the States, but has had small crossover thanks to Sirius XM. It’s fantastic.

-“Thrift Shop”

-“Share My Love” R. Kelly's best song in years. An absolute contender, at least. So damn good.

-“Sweet Life” Also would have taken “Thinkin’ About You,” but “Sweet Life” is preferred.

-“I Knew You Were Trouble”

-“Locked Out Of Heaven”

WILL BE SAD TO SEE YOU GO: Five songs that were hits in 2012, but released in 2011.

-“Somebody That I Used To Know”

-“Ni**as in Paris” Pretty much the Django Unchained of pop music. I presumed it could never be a hit, and I was wrong.

-“We Are Young”

-“Lights” Apparently, this song is nearly three years old. Who knew?

-“Young, Wild, And Free” This, along with “Locked Out Of Heaven,” have reversed my “Bruno Mars as Worst Trend” statement. So, yay!

BEST TRENDS

-“I Can Listen To All Of This!”

Except for the completely awful “Birthday Cake (Remix,)” I can at least sit along to almost everything on the radio lately, and I’m enjoying a ridiculous amount. Searching through the Hot 100 for songs this year was little work because I’d already heard and enjoyed most of my choices, and whittling my worsties down was far, far easier than reducing myself to only five besties.

-“The Singers are Back!”

Last year, I complained that Adele and Lady GaGa were the only people showing off vocal chops on pop tracks. Now, we have Usher’s most beautiful vocal yet, Bieber’s voice has come into its own, the indie rock stars generally have great voices, Ke$ha and Taylor Swift have only gotten better, and even our new folks like Carly Rae Jepsen and Ellie Goulding were pretty darn great. Let’s keep this trend up, please.

-“Variety!”

Guys, it’s weird having R&B vocals, rap songs, dubstep drops, light country, indie rock, synth pop, and whatever we want to call Drake and Alex Clare all showing up on the radio as a happy family. We even had a foreign language hit in Gangnam Style. Trends have gone insane.

-“Hard Rap On A Rise!”

“Mercy” is a top 40 year-end hit. Along with “Young, Wild, & Free” and “Ni**as in Paris.” This is incredible. And inexplicable. I love it. Let’s keep it up.

-“Death of Empires”

The first hit by an established artist on the top 100 year-end billboard chart is #4, with Maroon 5’s “Payphone.” After that, it’s #8, with Rihanna’s “We Found Love,” which was a hit last year. Of the top 10 songs, only three are by megafranchise artists.  That’s 30%. Taylor Swift’s highest charter is #33; Adele’s only brand-new song didn’t even make the list. Usher’s only charting song is at #72 on the charts. We’re finally allowing in new artists en masse, and it’s fantastic.

WORST TRENDS

-“Radio Just Not Getting It”

Okay, this is the first of two complaints about radio stations. The radio doesn’t know what to do with all the indie rock and R&B they’re getting asked to play.

This remix of “Somebody That I Used To Know” says it more accurately than anything else could.

-“Radio Pushing Junk On Us”

While there’s mostly listenable stuff on the radio right now and loads of variety, the radio stations themselves worked hard to sell perceived franchises that have never really been all that huge. I feel like I was hearing Pitbull and Kelly Clarkson non-stop, only nobody seems to care.

-“2 Chainz”

Look, guys. I don’t care what you guys do in your own time, but don’t make me listen to 2 Chainz, please? He’s on two hit singles this year, and that’s not even close to the only 2 Chainz that’s getting radio play. Unlike other rappers getting play, he’s enthusiastic; he’s also really, really bad. I can’t imagine he makes the charts often, but I just don’t think he’s cut out to be a radio staple.

-“Rihanna’s Fall”

What happened, Rih? First she dropped “You Da One” and “Where Have You Been” at the very start of the year when “We Found Love” was still massive. Drake also dropped “Take Care” at the same time. Then, she followed with the awful “Birthday Cake (Remix)” and “Turn Up The Music (Remix.)” That’s six songs on the radio at once. By the summer, everyone I talked to was completely sick of Rihanna, and I wasn’t any of her songs other than “Take Care” on the radio. “Diamonds” came out to almost no fanfare. Mismanagement of her potential (and legitimately interesting songs!) led everyone to be completely sick of Rihanna at year’s end. I’ve still got her poster hanging in my room, but that might not maintain forever.

-“Chris Brown’s Rise”

Chris Brown is on three hit singles this year. He’s still not good, he’s still a terrible person, and if we’re going to continue to berate Yeezy for taking a microphone at an awards show and dating/impregnating Kim Kardashian, we had better continue to berate Chris Brown for his extreme rage-fueled violence. The worst person in show business.

That, my friends, marks the end of my reflections on 2012 pop music. What’s up for 2013? Lady GaGa is set to release artPOP, which should definitely be interesting. I’d be shocked if new Drake, Adele, and Katy Perry albums don’t happen in 2013 as well. Whatever happens, it’ll be interesting to see how we follow up the revolution that was 2012. Thanks for reading, everybody.